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Honest Feedback
Honest Feedback offers compassionate support, advice and new perspectives on navigating life's challenges.
Honest Feedback
The Truth About Growth
What if the most profound growth doesn’t happen in the light... but in the dark?
In this soul-stirring episode, Brittney and Lisset pull back the curtain on what transformation really looks like. Beyond the Instagram quotes and shiny “after” stories lies the raw, messy, sacred terrain of real change—the kind that asks you to let go of who you’ve been in order to become who you’re meant to be.
“Growth is inevitable. You’re either growing or decaying,” Lisset shares, and this conversation dives headfirst into the often-avoided side of personal development: grief, loneliness, identity death, and the courage it takes to evolve.
✨ You’ll hear vulnerable stories from both of your hosts:
- Lisset’s journey through financial uncertainty and the loss of her closest friendship
- Brittney’s powerful path of coming out and reclaiming her true self
Together, they explore the four requisites to lasting change:
- Release – Letting go of old identities and beliefs
- Intend – Setting a powerful new direction
- Act – Taking consistent action aligned with your truth
- Focus – Staying the course, especially when it gets hard
Whether you’re in a season of expansion or feeling lost in the in-between, this episode is a permission slip to keep going. The breakdowns, the shedding, the solitude, it’s all part of the metamorphosis.
Your future self is waiting. Will you keep going, even through the dark?
🎧 Tune in now for a dose of truth, healing, and fierce encouragement.
Timestamps:
00:02 – Why the growth journey is often misrepresented
07:15 – Brittney shares her coming-out journey & identity death
15:40 – Lisset opens up about loss and financial fear
23:00 – The four requisites of change
32:45 – Navigating the “dark night of the soul”
41:00 – What to remember when you're ready to quit
47:10 – Final words: expansion is permanent
Created By: Honest Feedback was created by Brittney King and Lisset King.
Disclaimer: Honest Feedback Podcast aims to provide insights and provoke thoughtful reflection. The opinions expressed in this episode are for informational purposes only and should not replace professional advice.
Contact Information: Please send us your questions by leaving a voicemail at 971-895-4111, DM us on Instagram @honestfeedbackpodcast, or email us at thekings@honestfeedbackpodcast.com.
Social Media: Keep up with the podcast by following us @HonestFeedbackPodcast on Instagram, TikTok, YouTube, and Facebook.
Join us every week as we explore real stories, actionable advice, and deep truths to support your journey of self-discovery and growth. Don’t forget to subscribe, rate, and review Honest Feedback wherever you get your podcasts!
Honest Feedback was created by Brittney King and Lisset King.
Note: Honest Feedback Podcast aims to provide insights and provoke thoughtful reflection. The opinions expressed in this episode are for informational purposes only and should not replace professional advice.
Please send us your questions by leaving a voicemail at 971-895-4111, DM us on instagram @honestfeedbackpodcast or email us at thekings@honestfeedbackpodcast.com
Keep up with the podcast by following us @HonestFeedbackPodcast on YouTube
The amount of growth and sadness and courage it takes to keep walking through the darkness until you see the light, until you get to the other side of the tunnel. It's the part we don't really get to. It's not on the brochure.
Goddess Brittney:Welcome to Honest Feedback, the podcast where deep truth meets bold transformation. I'm Goddess Brittany King, a pleasure priestess and a transformational retreat facilitator who helps women connect to their deepest truths, reclaim their pleasure and awaken their inner power.
Lisset:And I'm Lissette King, an emotional ninja and transformational coach who helps leaders release baggage, heal unresolved trauma and step into their most aligned, purposeful lives.
Goddess Brittney:We've created this podcast for spirit-led individuals just like you, seekers of truth, personal growth and meaningful connection.
Lisset:Whether you're navigating life's big questions, craving more joy and fulfillment, or simply looking for honest, relatable conversations, you're in the right place.
Goddess Brittney:Through personal stories, actionable advice and transformative insights. Our ultimate goal is to empower you to create a life that's overflowing with pleasure, purpose and authenticity.
Lisset:We know you're capable of incredible things, so let's make it happen together.
Goddess Brittney:Welcome back to another episode of Honest Feedback. It is so good to be here with all of y'all.
Lisset:How are you feeling, babe? I'm feeling really good. I love this topic, yes, and I'm geeking out real hard.
Goddess Brittney:Oh my gosh, today y'all, we're going to talk about Lisette's favorite thing to talk about. Can you guess what it is? It's my top value. It's growth, it's growth, y'all yes.
Lisset:Everyone got it. It's growth, we's growth, y'all yes.
Goddess Brittney:Everyone got it. It's growth. Yeah, we are talking about growth and all the stuff about it.
Lisset:Yeah, yeah, and the growing pains of growth there are growing pains.
Goddess Brittney:Oh yeah, what? Nobody warned me. No kidding, we're talking about growth and we're talking about growing pains. And yeah, well, I mean you've already said it's your top value. What else do you want to say about growth before we get into it?
Lisset:Growth is inevitable. You know they're growing or decaying. Okay, so it's yeah.
Goddess Brittney:These are the options.
Lisset:These are the options growth or decay. And then people get mad because growth ain't pretty either.
Goddess Brittney:Oh gosh.
Lisset:Okay, yeah, well, I'm so excited.
Goddess Brittney:Okay, I'm so excited, but first I think we have a message from our sponsor. Yes, this week's sponsor is King Experiences. That's us, yes, that is us, and we are so excited to invite you to the goddess experience. If you are a woman who is ready for transformation, who's ready for growth, who is ready for her next evolution, this is for you, and we are here to love you up and spoil you absolutely rotten with luxury, high vibration foods, amazing community and just the most incredible land in Puerto.
Lisset:Vallarta. Oh my gosh, this land itself is a facilitator. People go here and they, they completely heal, lose 10 years in in the in their face, Like we are reverse aging on this land. It is beyond epic and the little casitas you stay in.
Goddess Brittney:Oh, the little open air casitas.
Lisset:It's magic, and we are there to serve you and remind you of the goddess that you are, the goddess you were born as, and to bring it into fruition. So you may be that person when you leave this retreat.
Goddess Brittney:Yeah, one of our clients who gave us permission to share. She shared with us that before she came to a retreat with us, that she did not know how to love herself and she was feeling lost. And now, in hindsight, her life reflected that and because of the retreat, because of the lessons, because of the energy, because of the frequency that we were serving there, not only does she love herself, she has been able to embody it and carry it forward. So her entire life transformed, based on her now loving herself. And the way she spoke about how we poured love into her. She said it was just revolutionary. And so I am always so honored to facilitate this space, the space of growth, the space of metamorphosis, and if it's something that calls to you, get in. Doors are just opening and already all the things are happening, all the perfect souls will be there.
Goddess Brittney:So if you feel it is for you, there are only nine seats available in this temple. Schedule a call, let's talk, let's have all the experience.
Lisset:We are so beyond excited to host you and have you there. Check out that link below. You are hearing this first, by the way.
Goddess Brittney:Yes.
Lisset:Besides our waiting list girlies. You are the first one to hear it here on this podcast. So check it out yes, and before we get into that question like share, subscribe, become part of our community. We love you, we love pouring into you, and so share this far and wide so we can impact more people. Yes, yes, all right, shall we read the question? Yes, we shall, and you know you're the official reader of all questions.
Goddess Brittney:Oh my gosh. Okay, I'm in a season where I asked for growth, but now I feel overwhelmed and exhausted. Is it supposed to feel this hard, and how do I know if it's worth pushing through?
Lisset:hard and how do I know if it's worth pushing through? Hashtag struggle? Yes. Short answer yes, it is supposed to feel this way. It's supposed to feel, however it is, that you're feeling it right now when we go through a growth aspect of our life we are go through a growth aspect of our life we are. First of all, an old. Part of you is dying away, and so there is a death. There is a mourning of who you used to be, the way you used to do things. What's happening is you're letting go of the way things were, the way you used to show up in the world. You cannot go back to the way you were. You know, if butterfly comes out of the cocoon, they're not like I'll just keep crawling around. You know you. You are expected to fly, you're expected to move through things, and that shows up differently for a lot of people. It's really challenging because it doesn't come on the label, on on the box. You know this may cause challenges, cause, honestly, you wouldn't do it.
Goddess Brittney:No, you got to sell that sizzle y'all.
Lisset:My life is incredibly different than it was when I first discovered expansion and growth work. The part that is not on the highlight reel, that's not on the Instagram reel, is I lost friends, I lost my community, I lost the people. I used to live a smaller life, with the people that I was drinking with every weekend and playing and doing all the things that I used to do in a different life. When I changed, they weren't able to meet me and there was a lot of resistance and grief and grief and sorrow and a long period of feeling alone. What was your experience Like when you first started growing? Did you find it to be lonely?
Goddess Brittney:Um, did I find it to be lonely? I mean, I felt kind of alone before it started where it was just like this disconnection I'll never forget.
Goddess Brittney:I was at a friend's birthday party or something like that, and everybody was drinking, myself included drinking way too much and there had just been like lots of like mismatchy kind of experiences and I got into a fight with one of my friends for who she had voted for. I did not agree and I was upset with her. I was like your boyfriend's black, like do you not understand what this means for us? And you know, and it was. I was all on my and later talking to some of the people in the group of friends. One of them was just like I just don't understand why you get so upset. Like I just think't understand why you get so upset. Like I just think it's better to just not talk about these things that make us uncomfortable.
Goddess Brittney:And I was livid because what I was seeing reflected back to me was a friend group who didn't know slash acknowledge that I was black, which also was a reflection that I was not sharing. I mean, they could see me, but I was not sharing my experiences of moving through the world as a person of color and how my life was different and I was expected to stay in this very small box, and so it made it really clear for me in a sort of a line in the sand moment, like we had already been kind of growing apart, but I kept trying to make it work. And then I found my boundary of yo. This doesn't work, this is not working. So then it was the oh, I'm going to have to actually start making some changes.
Goddess Brittney:And they were small. They were small. I don't know that. I thought I was signing myself up for growth. I was just like I can't be in the relationship with this guy anymore. I don't know that this friend group is for me. I was like I'm going to move in with my sister and her friend and like it was the slow cracks that led me to a bigger moment of like, oh shit, we really got to look at a lot of shit.
Lisset:And when you got into the deep growth, yeah, we, we know that you had a very pivotal you know, moment that, yeah, sent you into your growth, your expansion. You're seeking growth. When you got on the other side of growth, how did that feel Like when you started to deep dive into it?
Goddess Brittney:Well, when I started to deep dive into it, my growth started in community, which is not everyone's experience. So for many of you who have listened to the podcast or listened to my story, you know a little bit about this, and for those who do not, just a trigger warning. I experienced a rape that really spun my life, and in that moment it was when I got the choice of, like you can keep living life the way you are and you know, or you can choose something else, and it was me choosing something else that led me to the pole dancing community, the central movement community. That really changed my life, and so I felt held by it, because I immediately met new people and I felt the separation of oh, I'm having challenges with my family, with my new thoughts and new beliefs, and that part was a struggle.
Lisset:Yeah, yeah. So I absolutely understand and appreciate that it really helps to be in a new community when you're growing Like, can you grow in community? Can you sit in sisterhood, can you sit with people who are taking that next step in their life? When I first started, it was a seminar back in the day, something much like Landmark called PSI.
Lisset:And I got to grow with these people and it was wonderful. And yet, at the same time, at home, I was struggling to talk to my siblings, I was struggling to talk to my friends I hung out with and partied with and I was so excited about the expansion. And that's something that happens. That can happen is you get so excited about your growth and you share it with everyone and they're like not ready.
Goddess Brittney:I do remember that experience.
Lisset:Yeah, Like no, thank you. That's great for you I didn't even hear.
Goddess Brittney:That was great for you I heard I think you're crazy, right like I was, like you can control your thoughts with your mind and people are like you're insane they want to have an intervention.
Lisset:Yeah, they want to have an intervention.
Goddess Brittney:For me it's like she's meditating. She won't go to our western doctor yeah they thought I was crazy. But I feel you with that resonance of, that joy of when you have the lights turned on in your life. All of a sudden you're like, oh my god, you guys, there's light here, I can see more things. And for those who are still in the dark it can be really disorienting and they don't want to hear about our Lord and Christ.
Lisset:No, you don't want to hear about our Lord and Savior.
Goddess Brittney:Yeah, uh-huh, uh-huh, yeah, it's like. I mean for better use of like. I just feel like that metaphor really resonates with like people are like. I found a light. Let me tell you about it. It's like you can keep your light. No, thank you, Get off my porch.
Lisset:I do not want your pamphlet. Thank you very much. Yes, yes, yeah. And I remember that excitement and then the disappointment, the disappointment of like, oh, there was like an expansion and then, well, people aren't seeing me and meeting me and your life looks so different from a new perspective, and you allow yourself to see your world in a different way. And if you don't have a support system set up, if you don't have you know, if you're not aware that there's challenges, that it's not a straight line. If it were a straight line, you know everybody would do it. But you go up and then you hit an obstacle, and a lot of people hit an obstacle and they go. This growth thing's not for me.
Lisset:Yeah, you know and they stop and it's like when? When did we learn to give up at the obstacle? You know, because we didn't. We didn't have that as a child, you know, I didn't know. No, I mean it did. You know you were learning to walk. The first time you fell you were like was walking things not for me?
Goddess Brittney:No, children are resilient. We say it all the time.
Lisset:Yeah, children are resilient. They'll crack the code, they'll look for it, and you just keep going. You keep walking and you keep figuring it out and sometimes, when we have this big expansion, your mind can't go back to the way it used to be. So you can't go back to the old way it's growing. You're like, ooh, that's not working and your unconscious mind will seek your old patterns for comfort.
Goddess Brittney:That feels so familiar. I've done a lot of expansion my own life and sometimes, when an obstacle comes up, I'm like like I've made it so far in like health and fitness and all the things. I'm like treating my body like a temple, but all of a sudden an obstacle comes up and work and I'm like you know what we need? Pizzas plural, plural. Do you know what I need? The family size chip bag for one, you know, and it's like the old coping mechanism of this is how I used to survive shows up and it can be really unexpected. If you're like wait, I feel like I went to that three-day seminar. I listened to Tony Robbins. I'm in my future self. You know, I'm doing all the things, something happened and all of a sudden I'm right back there with that crack pipe. No, I'm kidding, no, I'm really kidding. That wasn't my path.
Lisset:That was not a real life experience.
Goddess Brittney:No judgment, no judgment, but yes but you know, that's how I feel about sometimes, like the addicting foods. It's just like mm.
Lisset:Yes, yes, and then you're seeking the safety of the old way.
Goddess Brittney:Yes, because you're like, at least in the old way. I knew you know this X, y, z was going to. I knew that so-and-so was a fuck boy. It was going to fuck me over. I knew if I drank this much like I'd make terrible decisions. I'd make terrible decisions and it's fine. You know, like yeah.
Lisset:So it's the known yeah, yeah, we, we. That's part of the discomfort that comes with it is you're going to swim in the unknown, yeah. And when you're growing and you're expanding, you're just like oh, this is really uncomfortable. And it's not that it's uncomfortable, it's that it's unknown. And your, your nervous system is like will I survive this? And when you learn to come to expect this it's something I really start to prepare my clients for is like we're in a three month container.
Lisset:Because you're, I always say, I can guarantee you're going to feel great on day one. I can guarantee that you will see life through a whole new lens. You'll be like oh my God, this is what it feels like to live without that baggage. And then, a few days in, in your old environment, things start to come up, triggers start to come up and it's just like can you remember who you are? Can you remember the wisdom that you gained? Can you stay focused on where it is you're going and not the obstacle that's coming up in this moment? Can you Absolutely? Oh my God, how do you do that? How do I do that?
Goddess Brittney:Yeah, how do you do that? Inquiring minds want to know?
Lisset:Well, you know, there's four requisites of change. I'm pretty sure I've talked about this before. My teacher, matt James, talks about these ad nauseum. It doesn't matter how many classes you've taken from him. This is where we start, yeah, so let's go back. The first one is release. You got to let go of the baggage. A lot of modalities don't actually have release work.
Goddess Brittney:I know A lot of them. Therapy, yeah, yeah, I know.
Lisset:They start at three and four. So step one is release. The second step is creating an intention, a compelling future, something that's pulling you, Because if you just let go of baggage and you have nowhere to go now, you just have an empty room you know, and if you've ever emptied a room, it fills up very quickly.
Goddess Brittney:Yes, yes, if there's not an intention. If there's not an intention, yeah. Sorry I just had a realization about our home, but yeah, yeah.
Lisset:So you have to have an intention like oh, this is going to be a guest room. This is going to be a baby's room. This is going to be my office. It's going to be dialed in like this is where I'm headed. You know, I let go of the baggage of the fuck boy. I am looking for partnership, true, authentic, loving partnership. I let go of that poverty mindset. Now I'm might have my eyes set on thriving on, you know, my first six figure month, or my Mm-hmm.
Lisset:You have to set your mind on where you're going. You have to do those two. You have to. They're called requisites for a reason. You will not create the change fully if you don't have those Steps. Three and four only you can do on your own. So I help people with one and two all the time in my work. Three and four the day I can do these. Oh, there's going to be another zero or two zeros on the end of my day.
Goddess Brittney:I will say you hold people accountable. I do, through step three and four, absolutely I do hold them accountable.
Lisset:They have to show up for it yeah, only you can take action.
Goddess Brittney:Yeah.
Lisset:And that is a different action. You cannot create a new life doing your old actions. Yes, you can't get that six pack still eating the pizzas. You know, like there's, there's discipline. Boundaries are new action. You got to put boundaries up with family, with friends, people who want to hold you in that old paradigm. You have to hold up your boundaries around that and boundaries with yourself.
Lisset:I will not do that anymore. I will not interact with that person anymore. You must keep up your boundaries, so you you, you're the only one who can take action. I can hold you accountable must keep up your boundaries, so you, you, you're the one who can take action.
Lisset:I can hold you accountable, but you can be the only one who can take action and you must focus. Focus on where you're going, focus on that intention, focus on the end result. If you're not looking at the end result, you're looking at the obstacle and you have to take yourself all the way to the end result. Time and time again, time and time again. When you hit an obstacle, that is a sign that you're getting closer. You hit the discomfort. That is a sign you're getting closer. The discomfort is part of it and it can be lonely, it can be sad. You are grieving a past version of yourself. You're grieving your old habits. I quit drinking a little over a year ago, thank you, and I'm so proud of it. And now I'm going to go hang out with my family and it's like that was a thing we used to bond over, you know and I get to reintroduce myself as the person I am and focus on what it is Like. Why am I doing that?
Lisset:Because I want to be a clear channel for the energy work I do like I am sites on that, yeah, and then putting up my boundary and then rinse and repeat, yeah you go through this. You're never done changing and it's, it's, it's a lot what would you say?
Goddess Brittney:I mean, I guess I'm like the feeling that comes through is like I would love for you to just share. Can you talk about like a specific moment you were in these crossroads and like how the four records that supported you or how you navigated this Because I hear you and I'm like sounds theoretical, yes, absolutely Sounds theoretical Literally. How did you real world, real world example. We need a story. Thank you, oh my gosh.
Lisset:There's. So there have been so many massive growth points in my life. Yes, and I will tell you before I had a career breakthrough that changed my life like in a massive way. I was so broke I couldn't afford like a hundred dollar ticket to go to Las Vegas. And I was I just remember being so and I was like, babe, I can't have this opportunity to go to this seminar. All I have to do is get myself there and you're like then you fucking get yourself there, we will figure it out.
Lisset:You know, that was a moment, yeah, and I was like, okay, and I went there and something that happened was we created a goal. What was the um? A game worth playing.
Goddess Brittney:It was called the Guap.
Lisset:Yeah, and so we created a Guap and in that moment for me it was I want to create $60,000 in a year. Yeah, and I had never done that before.
Goddess Brittney:Yeah.
Lisset:So I did my. I asked someone there who I knew did this work? I was like, hey, would you do a breakthrough on me?
Goddess Brittney:And she said yes.
Lisset:And so we go through the breakthrough. All of a sudden the baggage is gone. Yeah, I was like, oh my gosh, like I had this stuff around. I can't remember specifically what it was, but it just like it was something around, not feeling smart enough Like I won't be a good business owner, because I'm not smart enough oh right.
Lisset:And I'm like, oh so, so I'm sitting, you know, I let that shit go and I was like that's fucking stupid. I know some dumb ass people that make a lot of money and no disrespect, yeah a lot of money and no disrespect.
Goddess Brittney:Yeah, blessings on them. They're a beautiful example for me. Yeah, because money has nothing to do. Money has nothing to do with intelligence. Yeah, exactly so I let that shit go.
Lisset:And then she put me on like the strictest of strict, like we, this is where we're going. I had it, I had a money cock.
Lisset:Yeah, we called it and it was one of those thermometers, but the way I drew it just came out extra phallic. So I would, every dollar that came in I would like draw it in and I was filling the thermometer. So there it is like release the baggage, yeah, set the intention, yeah, you know, yeah, and and focus on that, no matter what. And I remember it was within hours of the end of my breakthrough that I signed my first person at my new price. And then a day after that and I think my breakthroughs are like 2,500 back then and I was, and like the next day I did another one, and then it was just like momentum. I go okay, what am I doing? That that matters, like what do I know that matters? And what matters is connecting with people, and not everyone wanted to connect.
Goddess Brittney:Yeah.
Lisset:And not everyone. I remember talking to people and them being like oh, change sounds scary, not interested, you know, but I never stopped having that obstacle in my mind and that's not the obstacle having that goal in my mind and focusing and focusing, no matter what happened, and showing up to reading the books that I was told to read and forgiving as often as I needed to forgive and just show up to my business and and through that, the change happened.
Lisset:A goal I had set for a full year. I got it in seven months and our financial life has always expanded since then because I know what matters to create the end result. Is that a good example?
Goddess Brittney:That is a great example. I mean, I'm saying it for the people, of course, no, but I it helps to hear like how one navigates it. What would you say has been the most either surprising quote, unquote loss or the most challenging loss to navigate, and how did you navigate through it?
Lisset:That's a great question. Let me be with it. Yeah, oh, I would say I had a friend. When I first did the seminar, I had a friend. She was my best friend. Gosh she was a coworker best friend Like I loved hanging out with her. We would get wasted, yeah like a white girl wasted. We would get really.
Lisset:It was gnarly, you know um blackout yeah blackout drunk and I got the moment of hey, did you know you're responsible for your life? And she didn't want to hear that shit. You know we got along through commiserating yeah, and we we had a lot of um, our friendship was built on that similarity.
Goddess Brittney:Our friendship was built on drinking, getting wasted and sleeping with boys.
Lisset:So all that changed as I healed and became more myself and became okay with who I am. That's something to talk about. In growth, too is, the more you heal and the more you grow, the more you become who you actually are, and so you stop masking, you stop trying to fit in where you're not fitting in.
Lisset:Yes, full circle moment for me, you stop trying to fit in where you're not fitting in. Yes, full circle moment for me, you know, with that friend group, yeah, and I think that for me was so hard, like I can feel a little choked up just from the space of like I so wanted her to come and I so wanted it. It's skeptical as fuck and and I know she sees my life like freaking rocking you know, and it's and I love her and I respect her, and everyone has you know um.
Lisset:Everyone deserves to grow at the pace they want to.
Goddess Brittney:Yep, yeah.
Lisset:Absolutely respect that and love that and it was sad. It was devastating for me. I remember crying a lot at the loss of that friendship.
Goddess Brittney:Yeah, Friendships. I feel like that's the part that you're shining a light on that not everyone is aware of. When we say yes to growth, it's like, yeah, my life's going to change. And people are like, yeah, it is, which means it's going to change, Like that sentence is is true, it is going to change. And some of I know my, some of my own internal conflict or turmoil has been like I want this over there. And then the universe is like, great, this is what it means to have this over there. And it's like, oh, but I wanted to keep all these same things. And it's like I wanted to keep the same small thoughts, the same small relationships, the same small ways of being, and it's like that's not who I become, to have that experience that I want in my life. And the fear of like what if I don't meet another best friend? You know what if I don't meet another? Da-da-da-da-da, and just allowing yourself to know that there's more on the other side, Like would you say you've met new friends.
Lisset:A hundred percent.
Goddess Brittney:I'd be real cheesy right now.
Lisset:I'd be like you're one of my best friends. Oh, you're one of my best friends. Yes, yeah you know of my best friends.
Goddess Brittney:Yes, yeah, you know, if not the.
Lisset:Yes, and that is that. It's that in between, that liminal space between what you've let go of.
Goddess Brittney:Yeah.
Lisset:And what you allow in that is. That's probably the darkness that a lot of people can't make it through. That is the choice. That's the point of the point of no return, where it's like well, I don't like this new way of thinking. Let me go back and pretend that I'm not magical.
Goddess Brittney:Let me how did you hold yourself through that? I mean, what's feeling like like almost like the dark night of the soul, but like that betwixt between, that in-between moment where it's like I now know something that I can't unknow, but I haven't gotten to where I'm arriving yet. What is it that you hold on to?
Lisset:Yeah. So one thing I want to say is as when I started growing, I was so excited and I thought my life would change instantly. And the thing about that first seminar is they didn't actually do release work. There was a like, there's a you could change your thoughts and you could change your life. And that's a slower process. It's a much slower process. You could change your thoughts and all of a sudden you're like my car is still breaking down, my home still sucks, my bank account still keeps going to negative, and so I was like I can control my reality. I can control my reality, and I did for a little bit and I found myself in this flow of magic and then things settled magic, and then things settled and I was like I almost felt like I lost my spark there for a minute.
Lisset:Yeah, you know and I. What happened was that truth that my mind creates, my reality got so lodged in there as a truth like the law of mind that was that's what they call it in. Who know, like the law of mind is everything's your mind.
Goddess Brittney:Everything is your reality.
Lisset:Everything, everything, everything, everything. You're experiencing everything inside of your brain, right here, in this tiny little part. So it's not actually happening out there. Where it's happening is right here.
Goddess Brittney:Yeah.
Lisset:You know, yeah, and if everything is your mind, I just was like kept coming back to responsible and it was one gift that they gave me is like you can be a victim or you can be responsible, and I just kept going back to I'm responsible for my reality. I have years of momentum of being broke, sad, lonely you know, and you know, in the closet and all the things it took several moments of my coming out journey came out through that when I was like I cannot deny that I'm gay anymore.
Lisset:Yay, yay we're all happy and I had to come out to my family. That was hard, that was challenging, that would you come out to first.
Goddess Brittney:Oh, alex my sister, oh yay oh, she was the best.
Lisset:Yeah, it was a very like okay, like kind of we knew the whole time surprise, surprise no one was really surprised, like not even my mom. No one at all was at all surprised. I think, my oldest brother. He was a little taken aback but, like everyone, was pretty cool with it. But that's part of the hardness that you never get told when you're going through the growth journey.
Lisset:You know you might have an awakening and not connect with God anymore like you used to. You might have a religious awakening. You might have a sexual awakening. You might have a financial awakening. You thought your entire life that you were being held down by the man and then you didn't realize it was like oh, actually I'm in control of my wallet.
Goddess Brittney:The boot on your head is yours. The boot on your head is yours.
Lisset:That was my favorite meme. Yeah, Um yeah, and so um. The amount of growth and sadness and courage it takes to keep walking through the darkness until you see the light, until you get to the other side of the tunnel. It's the part you don't really get to. It's not on the brochure.
Goddess Brittney:Well, thank you for telling us all about it.
Lisset:The truth about growth.
Goddess Brittney:No, I don't say that facetiously. The truth about growth no, I don't say that facetiously Something that I really value, that we do in both of our containers as individual space holders, but also for our retreat is we have this kind of conversation with our clients, with our students of like yo. So this is the part that wasn't on the brochure and we're going to tell you before you leave the space, so you're not surprised by it and you get the opportunity to choose to keep taking steps forward. I did. It was really great and it was very expansive and it was like a weekend of like magic, um, and I didn't really know what to do with it. Like I was just like I had this experience. That's great.
Goddess Brittney:I didn't decide to continue on cause I hadn't expanded to the point where I thought that that was possible for myself. Um, I, literally they were like you should invest and they were like you could give us a card, and I was just like I, literally they were like you should invest and they were like you could give us a card, and I was just like, okay, and they're like this card is declined. I was like, well, that is my reality, which is what I told you but, like you know, I didn't know what to do with the information, I didn't exactly know how to integrate it and I wasn't prepared for the like moments of choice. Like I think, I went to that experience, had an expansive experience and then, pretty shortly after, was back at Taco Tuesdays and having margaritas and the being in the ways that I knew how to be, because I didn't know what to do or how to sustain a change.
Lisset:Yeah, you know a lot of those things and I don't know. It's been a while since I've been there and I've spent a small fortune on personal development and a majority of the ones I went to before I discovered NLP, mer HUNA. There was no release work in them. There was no release work. They're like just change your mind and change your life. It's like not if your entire nervous system is dealing with the deep truth that you're unworthy and you don't deserve anything, because you ain't shit.
Lisset:You know. It's just like try to focus on that while you think terrible things about yourself, because that is what's at you. Believe at things about yourself because that is what you believe at the deepest level, because that's what reality is going to reflect back to you. Your reality will be reflected what you believe at the deepest level, not what you want to believe. Which is why affirmations can be bullshit. If you read affirmations that your unconscious mind is not in alignment with, it'll be like you're a fucking liar.
Lisset:And so if you don't do the first step of release work, which is why it's the medicine I serve. It's why I'm so passionate about it when you let go of your baggage. I've got a client right now who's just kicking ass like so beyond incredible financially. He's like I've never made this much money in a day and I'm like, yeah bro.
Goddess Brittney:Yeah.
Lisset:Yeah, and we're like, we know, like we, we believe in this, we know it and we, we live it but, you cannot do that with the baggage, you cannot do that with your old belief system.
Goddess Brittney:It reminds me of. I feel so grateful that you introduced me to these tools. Side note, of course we do release work at retreat. We do release work in all our stuff. But like anything we have there's really certain, but it's like trying to white knuckle, like something you have an addiction to.
Goddess Brittney:Like it's like, oh, if they just like stop doing drugs, if they just stop drinking, and it's just like that is a symptom of something that's deeper and you're white knuckling against that deeper thing, and if it's all that you've ever known, it can be such a Goliath experience. And what I noticed the difference was was, once I've had release work, then it's not a Goliath, it's easier for me to refocus and look towards the future and look towards the good, because I'm not actually trying to white knuckle my way like up a mountain up something that feels so arduous.
Goddess Brittney:It's like I was able to actually like put that shit down and then it's like, well, now I get to pick a new truth. I'm not carrying this old thing with me, and I feel like that is the difference that really makes a difference to catapult your life Absolutely.
Lisset:Kind of going back to like the room analogy is like, let's say, we empty and clean out a room, now we could put new furniture in. If you haven't done release work, your room is full of shit. You've got wall to wall boxes of opinions and beliefs that I love. That scene in Inside Out Nevermind Opinions and facts.
Goddess Brittney:Yeah, and they just get mixed up. They get mixed up, it's okay.
Lisset:They get mixed up. They get mixed up all the time I digress. So you have this room full of all these beliefs and ideas and it's wall-to-wall boxes, and you're trying to put a new piece of furniture in. You cannot do that, and so when you do deep release work, when we let go of the anger, sadness, fear, guilt and shame and the thing that's being reflected at the deepest level, what we do is we clear out the whole room, we detail it, we fine, clean it. Now we can put beautiful things in. Now you can put in the affirmations, now you can set that intention to where you're going.
Lisset:You know, one thing I want to say to this caller writer is they said how do I know if it's worth pushing through? It is, it just is. If you want your life to look the way it always has, then stop pushing through. If you want something different, you must go on. You must go on. I forgot the quoter who says it. It's like if you find yourself in hell, keep walking, don't stop there, don't set up camp. You know, don't stop there, don't set up camp, don't put your furniture down. Like keep going, because it can be overwhelming. And it like remember that you chose this. You asked for. You asked for this growth, and so keep going through. And when you hit an obstacle, it just means you're getting closer. So keep moving, keep learning to walk, keep taking those steps.
Goddess Brittney:I just want to say you mentioned you're like, hey, I'm growing and now I'm feeling exhausted and overwhelmed. And my curiosity is were you exhausted and overwhelmed before? Is that just a habit? You know, sometimes we get intimidated when we're trying something new and we forget it's the first fucking time. And when, like you're learning to do something for the first time, it does take a lot of focus, it does take a lot more energy and then, when it's on autopilot, it takes no energy at all. Like driving, you know, you had your hands on the wheels 10 and 2. Now you know, eating salads, doing makeup. I literally once burned my head with a curling iron because I was curling my hair while driving.
Lisset:That's a choice.
Goddess Brittney:I know LA traffic was very intense so I felt like I had quite a lot of time. Anywho, I digress, but it's like the habits that you are used to are on autopilot, so they don't take a lot of energy. It doesn't take a lot of energy to keep sleeping with the wrong man. It doesn't take a lot of energy to keep being broke, like if that's what you're used to. It does take energy and mana and focus when you are learning something new. So my offering and invitation is be kind to yourself and know you're not going to feel exhausted and overwhelmed forever. It might just be in this moment. That might be a strategy and a habit for keeping you the same.
Goddess Brittney:And 100 million, zillion, thousand, billion times yes, it is so worth it to grow. My life is better than I could have ever imagined. It's better than I ever could have dreamed it, and when I think about some of my darkest moments, when I didn't want to be here, when I wasn't sure what life was, when I was just and I chose to grow, my life has continued to awe and surprise me and just humble me with tears of gratitude. For that I'm so happy. I said yes to the growth Like I would not be with this woman today if I hadn't said yes to growth. I wouldn't have the friends that I have, I wouldn't be running my own business, I wouldn't be living in this gorgeous house, I wouldn't have my amazing dogs. Like there's so much goodness and I'm like every day. I am so grateful that my life does not look how it did before I chose to grow. It absolutely changed and it was absolutely worth it.
Lisset:Absolutely 100%. And throughout all of that, it's not on Instagram, it's not the highlight reel. There were some tough times. I, just a few months ago, I was sitting on the bed crying because I was leveling up to the next step and it was the biggest investment I've ever made in my life toward my own personal development. But I knew what it was. I was going to get on the other side of it and I'm sitting there crying Can we do this? And Brittany, being the loving goddess that she is, was like do you want to do this? And I'm like, yeah, and she's like, well then, we will fucking figure it out. And we did. And when you have your eye on the prize, when you focus on this thing, you set your intention on it will always. You will always find a way. You'll see some obstacles, but you will find your way out of it.
Goddess Brittney:Always, Always, always, always. Wow, this episode, this topic. I mean we can go on and on, and I feel like this is a great stopping point to digest, integrate, reflect. I mean we brought up a lot. So I would encourage if you are feeling things, activations, openings, ahas like this is a perfect time to get out your journal and ask yourself like what are my takeaways? What did I learn? How am I going to use this to support me in my life, where I am right now? Because the truth is, like she said, we're always growing or we're decaying, Like there is no standing still. If you think you're standing still, you're probably going backwards. So allowing yourself to reflect and feel into what feels most alive and true for you and how you can use it in your path.
Lisset:Yeah, such a juicy topic, thank you, thank you. Thank you for asking this question. Greatly appreciate you, yeah.
Goddess Brittney:Hashtag struggle thing yes.
Lisset:And if you have a question, give us a call at 971-895-4111 or message us at honestfeedbackpodcast on Instagram.
Goddess Brittney:And until we meet again, be honest with each other, yeah.
